Interview: Helen Longstreth

Kirstie Macleod is an artist working with textiles, paint and installations. Her show ‘Punctured Perspectives’ – an exhibition centred around the act of embroidery, features a 10-year British Council supported embroidery project involving 50 embroiderers, 15 countries and one red dress – opens at Rook & Raven gallery in London on 5 March. rookandraven.co.uk

Tell us about you
I spent my childhood living abroad – born in Venezuela and grew up in Barbados. Then I lived in London for 10 years where I pursued my life as an artist. Two years ago I was living in Tobago when I became pregnant. Now I am living with my two-year-old son Skylar in a small town outside Glastonbury in Somerset. To back-track, a few years ago I was on holiday in Tobago, on the last day I met Jason, a Tobagan sculptor and he completely swept me off my feet. We stayed in touch after I left but I couldn’t get him out of my head, I had to go back. So I moved out there to be with him. It was a whirlwind romance, a surreal, amazing experience. We ran a Caribbean restaurant near the beach, I painted by the sea, he sculpted, cooked and was also involved in turtle conservation. Unfortunately when I became pregnant everything deteriorated. Though we had planned having Skylar it was too much for Jason to handle, our cultural differences became more apparent and we just weren’t who we thought we were. It was a really difficult time and I decided I had to get out. I got on a plane back to England eight weeks pregnant and started figuring out the rest from there.

How was coming back to the UK pregnant and without Jason? How had life changed?
I knew I needed to come back but it was a hugely challenging time. I had to figure it all out, now as a single mother and also as freelance artist, with no maternity package… Being pregnant is the time you are your must vulnerable. I just wanted to retreat into a safe nest but I had to be the most courageous I’ve have ever been. It’s things you never thought you would have to navigate. You think you will meet your husband, have a baby and find a nice house in the country but it was so far from that. But going through that really does make you stronger. I also had great support from my friends, family and financial support from the government. After that it was more smooth sailing and of course at the end of it I have an amazing son, a sunshine. Despite everything it’s the best thing that could have ever happened to me.

How have you found trying to balance being an artist and a mother since having Skylar?
It is definitely difficult but at other times it works really well. When he was four months old I had a show in Paris. I set up my work in my kitchen, so that whenever he slept I would pop into the kitchen for an hour of intense work, and would do that back and forth for days. I was hugely sleep deprived and my world became quite surreal, always half awake and half asleep.

How has this balancing act affected you artistically?
Well, in that instance working from my kitchen meant I had to start doing things on a much smaller scale. But also thematically and emotionally my work has changed a lot since having a baby. Before I did large-scale pieces, with darker themes. They were very full on and dealt with female oppression. After Skylar it all became a lot lighter and more positive; my themes to do with rooting and birthing and my pieces were more colourful and surrealist. Now I am able to work two full days a week. It is restricted time but knowing you have to get a certain amount done makes you more focused and instinctual. People say my work is stronger and more confident. Before I would spend months and months on something because I thought it had to be so vast and perfect. Now I am more calm and can do things in a few days.

On reflection, how do you feel about the choices you’ve made?
In the beginning I was worried about how to be an artist while looking after and supporting a child. But not having a 9 to 5 job has meant I can dip in effortlessly and be more flexible with my time. It is a life rather than a job, the best thing ever. Financial worries about the need to support myself and my son while working freelance are always there, but for the moment I am very lucky. Despite all the pain and huge difficulties it’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.

kirstiemacleod.co.uk